399 | The Art of Gaining Perspective II

How many of you were just itching to push the “reset” button on last year? Or maybe even “fast-forward” past 2020 altogether? Well, we’re finally here!

While I can’t promise you better circumstances this year, I can tell you that your experience of life can definitely be better – if you want it to.

On today’s podcast, we’re breaking down “perspective-gathering” to a practical level, so we can gain more clarity, enjoy deeper relationships, and actually enjoy our lives more.

→ What?! Chris, you’re saying that if I just change my perspective, I can enjoy a better life?!

The short answer is YES! Why?

Here’s what I know to be true, the greater perspective that we have:

  • the better decision-making we have,

  • the better relationships we have,

  • the less need for control,

  • the less need for protecting ourselves,

  • the less need for building up walls,

  • the less need for feeling like somebody is on the attack

In this episode, I’m going to show you how to slow down, gain better perspective, and (with that perspective) get the most out of your circumstances and relationships.

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

perspective, clarity, people, gaining, information, question, life, understand, decision, spend, sincere, business, relationships, leader, outcome, high seas, focused, discover, folks, conversation

 

00:10

Welcome to the Chris LoCurto show, where we discuss leadership and life, and discover that business is what you do, not who you are.

 

00:21

Welcome to the show, folks. It is a brand new year, it is the beginning of a new year. Some of you may be super excited right now, some of you are like, well, it's just another day. Hey, we're excited. Some people want to just go ahead and press the reset button for last year, we get it, we understand, we're with you. It's been an interesting last 12 months. And who knows? We'll see how this year goes, but we are starting off with some excitement, or something, I don't know. Today we are talking about how you can have a better life by working on the art of gaining perspective. Now, we talked about this on episode 385, The Art of Gaining Good Perspective. And we also talked about this, we had a two parter on episodes 391 and 392, which was Surviving in a World of Monsters. So we're continuing on with this, to help you to have some great actionable steps that you can do starting right now. That you can put in, so that you can gain better perspective. So that you can learn the art of gaining perspective. Why is that so important? Because the greater perspective that we have, the better decision making we have, the better relationships that we have, the less need for control, the less need for protecting ourselves, the less need for building up walls, the less need for feeling like somebody is on the attack, the more perspective you have, the better decision making process you have, period.

 

02:05

It's that simple. Now perspective just means point of view, right? If you're just looking at the literal definition, but for us, what we call great perspective, is looking at it from every point of view. Gaining as many different points of view as you possibly can. Because the more you do that, the more information you have to make better decisions. Does that mean that every point of view has great information? No, of course it does not. But here's what our problem is, folks. We spend so little time gaining quality perspective, and we spent a lot of time shooting from our hip, right? I got this gut feeling. Or I asked one question, or I'm pretty sure I already know this answer. And unfortunately, it affects our decision making processes. Now, as we're talking through this, I am well aware of the different personality styles that are listening to the show, right now you high D's are going, "Oh my gosh, you just got to make a decision." Okay, D's, let me remind you of how many times people have to come behind you and clean up the mess you made, because you didn't get enough perspective. And then if we run that all the way to the high C's, the high seas are like, "I have no problem gaining perspective, I spend my four to five hours googling all the information I need to make sure that I have plenty." Now listen, we're not talking about having every single piece of information, we're talking about having the best quality information, and what does that look like, right? So you can spend a lot of time not getting anything, and you can spend a lot of time getting way too much. Our goal is, what does quality look like? And a lot of that has to do with the way you approach gaining perspective. That's why we call it the art of gaining perspective. So we're gonna be hitting all of that stuff when we come back right after this.

 

04:02

Hey, leaders, what has this year taught you? For many of you, the events of 2020 opened your eyes to core challenges and struggles deep within your business. I'm sure we can all agree that business as usual isn't cutting it anymore. But as a business owner, you may not know where to go from here. I'm here to tell you that it's time for something different. As a leader, it's time to pour into your business and your team by learning and implementing core skills that will make an immediate impact. I want to help you grow your business and make your team successful. It's time to sign up for the Next Level Leadership Live Event in April. This event is tailor made for small business owners and leaders just like you, helping you move forward even in a climate of fear and uncertainty. It's not a positive thinking session, but a strategic thinking workshop full of insightful and impactful learnings. It's going to equip you to return to your business and team with a powerful and practical plan that you can implement immediately. Tickets to the Next Level Leadership Live Event are available right now. And, at an extreme early bird rate, go to chrislocurto.com/liveevent for more information and to get your tickets. Again, that's chrislocurto.com/liveevent, it's time to change your business and your leadership for the better, don't miss out.

 

05:28

So the thing I want us to know is that our attitude toward ourselves, our attitude towards other people, our circumstances, you know, the attitudes that we have determine how well we will experience those very things. So in this episode, I'm going to talk to you about how to kind of slow down, so that you can gain better perspective and with perspective, get the most out of your circumstances and relationships. So let me just kind of hit a few situations that you can obviously see, that perspective is not being gained. Now. I happen to have been on this planet a few decades, and I have been on both sides of the not gaining wisdom from older people. It is amazing to me, how much of our world is listening to people who are wet behind the ears give their phenomenal advice on how the world should operate. It is ridiculous. I used to be one of those people, I was a teenager, I was a young 20, I was a young 30. And I will tell you, even though I'm somebody who did spend a lot of time trying to figure things out and gain wisdom and gain knowledge, there's still some times I can look back in my life and go,

 

06:57

I probably should have listened to that person a little bit more. So yes, I probably spent more time gaining wisdom and knowledge from older folks than a lot of people do. But I still had that as an issue. Nowadays, we can see that all over the place. You know, folks that are older just don't know anything, right? How many of you out there have kids or even grandkids and you can see, or shoot, as a leader, right? If you're an older leader with a younger team member, or even an older leader with a younger leader that you're trying to train up, you can see the decision making processes that they're having, you can see the things that they're doing, you know, how they can make better decisions, you know, that they can avoid some problems, you know, that they can avoid some pain. One of the biggest purposes for this show is for me to help you. I've screwed up enough stuff in my life and I figured out how to fix it. I'm sharing it with you. Right? When you look at the stuff that we do inside of this business, a lot of this stuff exists because of my failures in life. And God has shown us how to fix these things and move forward and teach others to do the same thing. Well, folks, guess what, let me speak to all you younger folks, there are a lot of people who have great wisdom on how to avoid pain, that they can help you with that very wisdom, if you could be vulnerable enough to receive it. So let me say that again. Or let me say it in a different way. Many times, we feel like we have to absolutely prove ourselves to the world. The younger you are, the more you feel this, right? I've got to prove myself, I've got to prove myself to this person who's over me, I've got to prove myself to this leader, I've got to prove myself to my parent, we always want to prove ourselves. And what happens is, we believe that if we go and prove ourselves, people are gonna think we're more worthy. They're gonna think better of us. And what we miss out on and you really don't get this until you get older. If we actually gain the wisdom ahead of time, we make better decisions, what does that prove? It proves that we're smarter than we think we are. Right? Because here's what we're trying to prove. We're trying to prove that we're really smart by not taking wisdom from people who've been there before, so that we could prove it ourselves.

 

09:37

That's just a mess.

 

09:39

Every time you try and prove how amazing, how smart, how capable you are, by only going off of the information that you have in your head, here's what I can promise you, you have a much higher chance of not only being a failure, but proving to people that you don't know what you think you know.

 

10:01

Let me set another way. I think it was Abraham Lincoln, I probably screwed this up. But I think it was Lincoln who said, "It is better for every person to think you a fool, than to open your mouth and prove them right."

 

10:17

Every time you do not go after perspective from somebody who's been there, guess what you're doing?

 

10:25

You're showing them that you don't have the ability to. That you can't be vulnerable enough to. That you don't have the wisdom to go gain wisdom from somebody else. Anybody who is old enough to look back at their younger life and see that they've done that before, understands exactly what I'm talking about. Anybody who has kids or grandkids and you look at them, and you go, if only they would listen to me, I can help them, they're going to go do something really stupid, and then they're gonna come back, and they're gonna ask me to fix it for him afterwards. This is what I'm speaking to.

 

11:02

So that's the first thing I wanted to point out is the difference of how we approach who has wisdom and who doesn't, the difference of how we approach trying to prove ourselves, another way is that when you have better perspective, you make better decisions. So take a look at all of us out there that have ever made snap decisions, because we feel like we just don't have time. You know, there's thought leaders that are out there that are like, just make the decision, fix it later. Man, I'm gonna tell you, I have had to fix a whole lot of people's bad decision making over the years. And here's the crazy thing, even a modicum amount of perspective gathering would have changed the decision.

 

11:53

Would have educated the person better on how to make a better decision.

 

12:00

So too many times, we don't spend enough time just gaining different perspectives, so that we can make better decisions, more informed decisions. Now, let me speak to the opposite of that, I'm not talking about paralysis of the analysis, right? That we spend so much time that we never actually make the decision, there's got to be a balance. Another aspect of this is being frustrated with the process of gaining perspective, "Well Chris, I don't have that much time to go talk to people or find people or spend time on the internet trying to discover this information. The process itself just kind of sucks. Can't I just make the decisions? Or can't I just do the thing?" Yep, you absolutely can. And I get it, I understand. But here's what you will learn, the more time you spend working on the art of gaining perspective, the easier it will be.

 

12:57

When you come into this building. If you talk to my team, you will find that they will tell you that I am somebody who wants to know their thoughts, their opinions, what is their perspective on the thing that we're working on? Why? Because I hire smart people. And I want to use their brains. If I think I'm the only one who has great ideas, guess what? We're in trouble, or I just don't need anybody else, right? If I'm just so smart, then why do I need everybody else? So instead of hire really smart people, and make sure that I'm actually taxing the collective intelligence. Another aspect of this is, the difference of intimacy, versus the divide we create when we don't get great perspective. So

 

13:45

in other words, the more time you spend gaining perspective, in a relationship, whether it is a spousal relationship, a dating relationship, whether it's a working relationship, a best friend's relationship, no matter what it is, the more time that you spend gaining perspective, the closer the relation gets to be. So what we tend to do in a lot of relationships is assume that we know what a person is thinking, what they're feeling, why they're saying the thing that they're saying. And all of this can end up in an actual divide in the relationship, because we can take offense to it. Or we can feel like we're being attacked, or we can feel like we have to build up a big old wall to protect ourselves because we just don't understand what happened. So think about this. How many times have you said something to somebody and they responded in a way, and you're like, why in the world are you responding like that? And their response is like, well, you're attacking me, you're saying something that's offensive. And you're like, why in the world is that offensive? And then as they explain theirselves you like that's not even what I meant. That's not even what I said.

 

15:00

And you discover that if they would have just paused, asked a simple question, gain some perspective, gain some insight in the process, then they wouldn't have to take an offense to the thing that you said, right? It doesn't mean that you don't have to take responsibility for how you put things out there. But it's amazing that how many times I sit in Next Level Lives, Stratplans, teaching situations, my marriage, it doesn't matter what it is, when somebody says something, and I will say, hey, perspective gathering question. What did you mean by that? Or did this mean this? Or, what were you thinking when you said that? Or what were you experiencing when you said that? And I will ask perspective gathering questions, to make sure that the initial thought that I have in my head is either right or wrong. Because what if it's wrong? If it's wrong, and my initial response is to take offense, then I'm going to be offended on something that I should not be offended by. I can tell you, I learned this early on from leaders that would never gain good quality perspective, you know, they might hear something from somebody, and then they go rip somebody else's head off. Because they assume that the information they got from the first person was correct, only to find out by the person that they just rip their head off, that the information were actually wasn't correct. And then they look really stupid. I think we've all experienced that. I know, I've done that in the past, I'm sure as you know, as parents, we do this. It's amazing when you just stop and say, Okay, here's the information I have, let me go look at it from different perspectives. It's incredible the information that you gain from the other perspectives. And it's amazing how much it stops the offenses, it stops the need for defense, it stops and the need to protect. And what it creates is greater intimacy, instead of greater divide.

 

16:55

Last piece on this.

 

16:58

When you do not gain quality perspective, then you limit your growth. When you do not learn the art of gaining perspective, then you keep you exactly where you are, with your limited knowledge with your limited abilities. You keep you with the information that you have, instead of growing like crazy. That is one of the things that I love about the art of gaining perspective, is that the more time I will believe that I don't have enough information or may not have the right information or the right answer, and that I can get more information just by asking some questions. It grows me, it stretches me, it is crazy powerful. All the folks who are listening to this that have ever been through Stratplan, there's a fantastic element, not everybody gets to experience this, it depends on how the Stratplan is going. But there's an element that we do that causes a whole lot of frustration at the table. And without going into too much detail, because I don't want to give too much away. But there's this thing that I do where I will push on the people to answer questions, and they keep turning to me with their opinions and their statements wanting me to give them an okay on their answer. And I don't. And at some point, they get really super frustrated. And then I ask a question. So if you've ever heard this phrase before, that comes from Stratplan, I'll say Hey, does anybody want to ask a freaking question?

 

18:38

And it's just this great, shocking moment that people realize, Oh, my gosh, all we have done, Chris is asking us to answer these questions, and instead of discussing instead of getting greater perspective, we have a group of people 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 people sitting around a table leaders, not even having good quality communication. We're all just throwing out our opinions and making statements. No wonder that we struggle with communication. It's a fun part for me, all those people that have been through Stratplan that are listening to the show right now they're like, yep, I remember that moment. That was painful. So, these are the things that if you understand who to go get wisdom from, who to gain perspective from if you understand that, it'll help you make better decisions. If you understand that the process by going after the process and learning the process, that you'll actally get better at the process, it removes the frustration, and that it creates better relationships, and it will grow you this will change your life. This will give you a better life.

 

19:45

This I can promise. How can I promise this? It's simple. When you do these things, it removes a bunch of the junk that brings down your life. It removes a bunch of the offensiveness.

 

20:00

It removes a bunch of the bad decision making, it removes a bunch of the assumptions, it removes a bunch of the heartache, it removes a bunch of that. It removes a bunch of the arguments and conflict back and forth between people who are just only focused on their opinions. When you do this stuff, it changes your life for the better. So we're gonna get into a couple of these things. We've got three rules that you must follow if you're going to grow in the art of gaining perspective. So we're gonna get into those three rules when we come back right after this.

 

20:43

Next Level Life is our two day personal discovery experience. It's a one-on-one personalized event where we guide you through a process to help you discover your root system, to get unstuck in life, and to discover what's holding you back from freedom and peace. Imagine this, what if you could wake up every morning with a clear purpose? What would it look like to have healthier relationships with less conflict? Where would you be in a few months, a year, five years, if you had clarity, purpose, and peace? Probably a big difference from where you stand today. Now, I know it's possible, because I've been where you are, asking myself, is there more? There is, and there is a better way. And it starts with Next Level Life, you can go to chrislocurto.com/discover to take the next step. Now, if you're struggling with discontentment, regret, or not feeling good enough, which most of you are, if you're filled with anxiety, or your relationships are lacking, don't keep going through the same motions every single day, learn how to move past the things robbing you of peace. Go to chrislocurto..com/discover and take the next step.

 

21:58

All right, we are back and we are hitting the three rules that you got to follow. If you're going to grow in the art of gaining perspective. Are you ready? Here we go. Rule number one is: clarity.

 

22:12

Clarity is absolutely vital if you're going to gain perspective. Think about it. What is the concept of gaining perspective? Again, if perspective by definition just means my point of view, I'm probably pretty darn clear on my point of view. I probably have clarity on what I see. It's an interesting thing we do, again, I'll do it in Stratplan, I'll do it in Next Level Life, where we'll be talking through communication. And I'll have a stainless steel coffee container on the table. And I'm at one end of the table, and everybody else is along the sides, and at the other end of the table, and I'll ask the question, Hey, folks, What color is this container? And it's stainless steel. And so they all will say it's silver, it's gray. And I'll say, what if I told you it's blue? And inevitably, at least one person will go I'd say you were stupid. And then I turn the container, and I say what if as I turned this container, my side was blue, what would you say then? And it's just that big light bulb over everybody's head. They're like, Oh, gosh, I would say, I didn't see it from your side.

 

23:29

Guys, that's the clarity that we're looking for when it comes to gaining perspective. Every single time you assume that you know everything about the subject, everything about the object, everything about the whatever is being discussed, you make a massive mistake. Because unless you have worked your way all around it, and have looked at it from all perspectives, then you only have your level of clarity. So a big piece is as you're starting to gain perspective, or you're working on growing and gaining perspective, is understand that as you ask questions, ask clarifying questions. Hey, can you help me to understand? Can you let me know why you're thinking this? Can you show me what you see from your side? The questions need to be ones that bring clarity, not controlling statements, not, you know, asking leading questions, but really asking the question to go, "I want to know what you think." Now as a leader, so listen, all of you leaders and parents and anybody who leads anybody, understand that if you are ever in a difficult or tough conversation, and you don't have all the information, you're going to look kind of stupid.

 

24:57

You're going to look kind of bad. When you go and tell somebody or accuse somebody of something or start a conversation about something, and you find out that you're actually wrong. Right? Clarity. Clarity gets you the ability to have a greater, tough conversation. Now, let me speak to all of my S's and C's out there who can't stand conflict. This, the clarity rule is powerful for you, as a leader, having a tough conversation. Why? Because if you keep asking the other person, who even may be somebody who's trying to control the situation, right? They could even be a stronger, more dominant personality style than you. If you keep asking for clarity on the thing that you're discussing, then guess what? They either have to answer it or avoid it.

 

25:52

The more clarity you get, the more you're able to use that information in the tough conversation. I can't tell you how many times I've been leading people for oh, geez. This year will be 30 years of leading people. Wow. Whoo. Well, there's little reality check right there. So this year will be 30 years, I've been leading people. And I can't tell you how many times I've been in a tough conversation with somebody incredibly dominant or incredibly controlling, or even abusive in the way that they handle themselves. And I just keep asking for more information. "Well help me to understand this. Well help me to understand that. Well help me to understand why did you do this? Help me understand why you said this to this person over here. Why did you do this thing?" And as I go through, if they try to avoid the answer, then I just keep coming back to the same thing. "Hey, that didn't answer the question I'm asking, can you give me the answer to that question?"

 

26:54

And as I do that in a tough conversation, then it reveals something, they realize,, I'm not backing down.

 

27:03

I'm not struggling with the conflict either. Why? Because I'm not putting it all on my brain power. I'm also putting it on their answers as well. So the more clarity I get, the easier the decisions, the easier the tough conversations, doesn't mean that it's going to remove the conflict. But it gives you the ability to have a much better discussion with somebody when you're having a tough or difficult conversation. Another thing you have to understand about clarity is depending upon your personality style, the way you focus on clarity may make or break your growth. Let me speak to C's. Here's what I want you to hear high C's. Never wait for clarity. Go after it. So where my D's will go in and snap decisions, and I's will get in there make pretty fast decisions, S's and C's slow it down. But when you get to the high C's, here's something that holds you back. You're looking to check the thing off of your list.

 

28:09

Or, worse, you're waiting for somebody to come and give you clarity. We call it putting the thing on the backburner. So for a lot of high C's, they won't get clarity in the moment, they won't ask questions, and why? Every high C understands the answer to this, because you don't want to look stupid. Right? You don't want to look wrong. So instead of speaking up and asking questions, you will wait. And then what happens is is somebody comes along goes, "Where are you on the thing?" "Well, nobody told me how to do that." "What do you mean nobody told you how to do that, you're a grown adult. Why didn't you get information?" "Well I was waiting for somebody to come tell me." That's silly. You should be jumping in and getting information. So know this. If you're somebody who tends to put things on the back burner, you're holding you back, which means you're also holding your growth back. Go get the information, do not fear it. Just ask for different perspective.

 

29:10

I can't tell you how easy it is once the C changes their vocabulary instead of just asking a question, and they put in there "Hey, perspective gathering question. What did you want me to do with this? Hey, perspective gathering question, how should this go? Hey, perspective gathering question. Can you give me more information on this?" Right? Throw that stuff in your conversation and it changes what you get as far as information.

 

29:37

Rule number two. This is one of my favorite rules and favorite pieces of being great at the art of gaining perspective. Rule number two is: curiosity. Folks, all of you that have been through Next Level Life with us, you've probably had some point in that event where we say, be curious. If you are going to gain better perspective, if you're going to gain perspective outside of what you already know, you've got to be motivated by curiosity. I want to understand what you know, I want to understand what you think. I want to understand what you see, from your perspective. This is huge. Because so many times, we're really not thinking about that. We're really not caring. Right? Many times, people just don't care what the other person thinks because all they can do is think about their own position and their own opinions and their own statements, right? The moment you become curious, now I can promise you, if you actually literally become curious, you will ask a heck of a lot more questions. So yes, this is gonna take more time. But the information you get will change the trajectory of the conversation. It will change the trajectory of your emotions, your self-protection, your need for defense, your need to be offended. It will change the trajectory of the project you're working on. Right? How many times has somebody given you a project to go do, and instead of being curious about it, you just take the information you're given and run with it only to come back 17 different times to try and get more information. The more you're curious about why something is happening, why somebody wants something a specific way, why a person is saying something the way that they're saying it, what they're thinking, how they're feeling. The more you're curious, the more it changes, the perspective that you gain, it changes the way that you understand things, instead of being understood, right? It's you understand versus being understood. It changes your ulterior motives. It's really difficult to be curious about another perspective, and be focused on only your perspective, right? It changes, you driving towards certain outcomes. Many times, we know we already know the outcome we want. And we will do whatever it takes to get to that outcome. When you are curious it can change the direction.

 

32:35

It can change the outcome itself. When you're curious about the honesty of the perspective itself. Then amazing things happen. It changes your direction, I can't tell you how many times I have had God change a direction that I was going in by giving me perspective that I had not gone after. And the moment I got it, I could see that if I didn't shift, then I'm going to get an outcome that I want, not an outcome that he wants. That's powerful folks. There is nothing greater than going with the outcome that God wants over the one that you are going to choose. You can see that it's going to be better. He's God. Yeah, it's pretty easy.

 

33:22

Rule number three: sincerity. Guys, without being sincere, our motives get twisted. Sincerity means that our questions are free of deceit. They're free of hypocrisy. They're free of falseness. They're free of control. They're free of being leading.

 

33:50

When you are sincere with how you go about gaining perspective, then you remove all of those selfish ways and focus on getting to the right information. Once again, a powerful tool when said with sincerity and curiosity is, help me understand. Help me to understand what you're thinking there. Help me understand why you did that there. Not an a, "Help me understand why you did that. You big jerk." That's what we're looking for. Right? When you are focused on sincerity, you're focused on not trying to score points.

 

34:32

When you're focused on sincerity, you're focused on not trying to convince other people. How can you tell you're trying to convince other people? Your questions usually start out with, "Don't you think? Don't you think this is the right answer over here?" Or, they end with, "Right?" You know, the right with a question mark, right? When you're being sincere you're not trying to convince other people.

 

34:58

When you're being sincere, this is a tough one. You're not trying to be right or justified.

 

35:04

If I sincerely want to know greater perspective, whether it's your opinion, whether it's, you know, a better decision, no matter what it is, if I'm focused sincerely on perspective, great quality perspective, then I'm not focused on being right. And I'm definitely not focused on being justified. If I'm sincere that I'm not trying to manipulate the outcomes, when you're not trying to manipulate outcomes, it works better in your favor. Think about this. Even if somebody said, "Well, Chris, what if somebody is putting out an unhealthy outcome?" Guess what? If you're sincere with how you're going about perspective, you're going to discover that, right? But what happens if you're the one trying to manipulate the outcome? Then you might be affecting somebody else in a negative way. You might be changing a better outcome. I can tell you, as I've gotten older, I hold so much of my life with an open hand. Because I've seen when I've pushed against God, and he's asking me to do something, and I'm not ready, or it's not the outcome I want, and I end up having a worse outcome, because I didn't stay trusting Him.

 

36:28

So the more sincere you are, the less you're focused on trying to manipulate outcomes. Also, the more sincere you are, the less you're trying to prove how smart you are.

 

36:41

Folks, it's amazing the amount of time, so think of all the time in a day you keep spending, trying to prove how smart you are to somebody, how good you are, how worthy you are, how capable you are.

 

36:57

All of that time, that you're spending, is time that you're wasting on going and becoming better.

 

37:06

If you are sincere, you're not focused on proving how smart you are.

 

37:10

Right? You're not focused on proving how great you are. Instead, you're growing, you're becoming smarter, by gaining greater perspective. So let's kind of turn this around a little bit, right?

 

37:23

Think about what it's like when somebody is not operating in these three rules. What happens when somebody doesn't want clarity? Well, how difficult is that conversation that you're having with that person? What is it like when somebody has no curiosity whatsoever? They don't want to understand anything, they don't care. They don't desire, greater information or greater perspective, how difficult is it in that moment? What is it like when somebody could care less, they're not sincere, they want to score points, they want to convince you, they want to show you how right they are, they want to show you how smart they are? So look at these three rules, every single one of us can look at these and go, "Oh, I hate that. When somebody does that." Well, look, if you do, and we all do, then what should you do?

 

38:15

Right? That should be greater proof of why it's so important for you to have clarity. For you to be curious and for you to be sincere, right? Let's look at it this way. How many times have you had a conversation with somebody who is curious? How did it make you feel? When somebody does want to know your actual perspective and your opinions and your thoughts on something? How does it feel when somebody is sincere? How does it feel when somebody you know, you have greater information than they do about the thing that they're going after, how does it make you feel when they come to you for it? When they ask you for it? I love with our Next Level Mastermind groups, we do four events a year with our clients, and almost every event somebody is bringing a teenage child, right, to one of our retreats or something, that they're these kids want to learn and grow. You know, they might take over the business someday. I love it. When youth you can see that a parent has done a great job of teaching the child to be open. When a youth is coming to a business event with a bunch of leaders and a bunch of business owners, and they're asking questions. They're not just sitting there. They're definitely not playing video games. They're not on their phone. They're soaking up information, because they sincerely are curious and trying to gain clarity on something that's going to change their future. Oh my gosh, I love it. I love it. I love it. I love it. Right?

 

40:00

It's great to see young minds operating at that level, if we can only get older minds to do the same thing. So, folks, change your year. It's the start of 2021.

 

40:16

Change the way that you're going to approach this year, change your circumstances, change the conversation, change the outcomes, that were only based on your perspective. Change everything, change your life, right?

 

40:33

Take these rules and start operating in these things. Make it your goal this year, I don't know if you've got a word of the year, some folks have a word, some hope folks have a goal, whatever it is, make it the art of gaining perspective.

 

40:54

Right? If it's just a word, then make the word perspective, whatever it is, make this year, a year that you focus on, gaining better perspective, not just in a conversation, but becoming great at it.

 

41:11

Becoming somebody who does a phenomenal job of getting better information. When you do that, it will change your life, I can promise you this. For a lot of you, it will break you out of old ruts. For a lot of you it'll tear off last year's blinders.

 

41:29

For all of us, it will help us all to see new light, and it will help us to enjoy more life. So what do you have in your life right now, that can help you gain some perspective? I can tell you one thing, if this is challenging, if this is good information, you're listening to this going, "Oh my gosh, I've got to do that." This is how we operate this business. This is how we do the show. This is how we do the products and services that we provide. So many of you know you need to get your butt into Next Level Life. Get your butt in, gain a whole lot of perspective on how you can change your life. Some of you are just kind of stuck in life maybe plateaued. Some of you been through some heavy duty stuff, get your butt in Next Level Life, get it changed. Many of you leaders and business owners do not have a support system with great teaching to help you grow your business, get your butt in our Mastermind program. Change your business, change your leadership, do these things, put these things in your life that are going to help you to grow and become better. Change your perspective, right? Gain better quality perspective, especially by people who've been there and know how to teach it.

 

42:53

For a lot of you, you've got to get your face in God's Word on a consistent basis.

 

42:59

Get your face in Gods word. I'm not talking about a devotional a day, get your face in His Word, spend time daily, every single day, you got to spend time. "Well Chris, I don't have time." That's what you're saying to God, "I don't have time for God."

 

43:17

You need to change the perspective of that. Trust me, the more time you spend with Him, the greater your life will be. Many of you need to get off of social media, get the crap off of it if it is affecting you in a negative way. I've had to go through and just unfollow a ton of people that are just so negative, and I can't handle it. Right? I don't I don't need all of that. I don't even want all of that, right? That's not the kind of perspective I need in my life. And then every single one of us needs to get out there and do some good for others. No matter what it is, find a way. If it's just spending time sitting with somebody, with the ministry of presence, then get out there and do that. If it's being a positive influence, then get out there and do that.

 

44:11

If it's delivering food, or helping out homeless, or whatever it is, spend some time doing that.

 

44:21

Here's the deal. God is very aware that you can't persuade or change people. He just knows it's your job to try.

 

44:32

It's your job to deliver the information. Go be positive in somebody's life today.

 

44:37

Well, folks, hopefully this has helped you. Hopefully this has helped you kick off 2021 with a better attitude, a better perspective, right? A better direction. If you put these things in place today, it will change the rest of your year. As always, take this information, change your leadership, change your business.

 

44:59

Change your life, and join us on the next episode.

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