643 | Too Much Leadership—Communication, Problem-Solving, and Guidance

Are you doing so much for your team that they've stopped thinking for themselves?

Today we're talking about what happens when leaders over communicate, over solve and over guide and how to lead with influence instead of interference. That is coming up next.

Welcome to the Chris LoCurto Show where we discuss leadership and life, and discover that business is what you do, not who you are.

Welcome to the show, folks. I hope you're having a fabulous day wherever you are.

Intro: The Goose and the Golden Eggs (Aesop’s Fable) (00:00:44)

Today we are going to start off with a story, a fable, Aesop's fable of the goose that laid the golden eggs.

I think everybody knows this one. You know, once upon a time, a farmer discovered his goose was laying golden eggs. Every day, one golden egg.

But the farmer grew impatient. He wanted more, faster. So in his eagerness, he killed the goose only to find there were no eggs inside.

What is the lesson here? Too much control, too much interference, too much leadership can actually destroy what's working. It's the same thing in your business.

When you lead too much, you can kill ownership, you can kill initiative, you can absolutely kill growth in your team. So you may mean well, but your team starts to rely on you for everything and it stops the growing process.

Now, a lot of us are those types of people that want to solve and fix things.

A lot of folks find a heck of a lot of worth in solving and fixing things. That was me in my early days. I learned very early on, back in the days when I was at.

I was on the ground floor of E Trade, when it was up and coming, I learned that if I was the one solving everything or if I had every answer, then I learned that I was not the only smart person in the room.

Everybody else had good answers. And if I was doing everything myself, then it kind of dwindled the gleam in their eye, right? Instead, if I just asked questions and guided and directed and helped get people to a place of thinking for themselves.

And I didn't get all of this at one, you know, lightning moment, but I just started to realize everybody else here smart too. How about I help them get to a certain place?

So we're going to talk about what this looks like in communication, problem solving, guidance, all of those things.

Over-Communicating Can Create Confusion, Not Clarity (00:02:41)

The first thing that we're going to talk about is over communicating. Now, we had a great discussion last week.

The episode last week was on Under Communication.

Today we're talking about over communication because over communication can create confusion instead of clarity.

So if you are constantly updating your team, emails, text, slack, impromptu meetings, and everything becomes a directive, then you might find out that you're actually not being helpful.

You might find out that because of so much information, your team has stopped understanding what is priority.

You've given so much communication, it's been so excessive that instead of feeling like they are, you know, given reins to do what they're supposed to do and what you hired them to do and kind of make things happen, they might be feeling micromanaged.

It can absolutely create, and this is super important, an information fatigue.

Too much information disrupts focus. I cannot tell you how many people throughout the decades have come to me and have said, Chris, I've read every book from so and so.

I've watched all these YouTube things, I listen to your show, I do all this stuff and I'm stuck. I don't know what to do. And I will say, stop. Quit putting more information in. Just listen to this show.

That's the only one you need. It really is the only one you need. Right folks?

Stop putting so much information in your brain. Find one thing that you need to go work on and you probably have enough information to make that thing happen.

But what happens when you put so much information, you're consistently reading self help books or how to run your business better by this person and this person and this person and this person, they're all going in different directions.

Then what happens is you don't know what to do, you don't know how to do it, you don't know what to think, your focus becomes disrupted and unfortunately you get information fatigue.

So more communication doesn't equal better communication. Now I'm always going to be somebody who says over communicate where it's needed.

You know, it makes sure that people understand the project we are doing, the destination we are going to, you know, the things that we're trying to solve, whatever it is, make sure that we're communicating heavy there.

But that's not what we're talking about here today. What we're talking about today is when you're constantly giving new information. Do this, do this, go this direction.

Here's what we're focusing on. Here's this, here's that. That it becomes too much for somebody to really prioritize their job or even, you know, like I say, they may feel like they don't know what to do in their job.

So what do you do instead? Filter what needs to be said and when.

Does everybody need to hear this right now? Does this person need to hear this right now? Is this something I need to share? Right.

Use consistent meetings, purposeful rhythms, weekly meetings. Brief check ins to help people to know the information that they need in the moment.

It's also a great place to find out, am I giving you too much? You know, something you will hear me say all the time, a lot of folks hear me say is, does that make sense?

I will ask that question a lot. Sometimes I will ask, is that too much? You know, I also teach Bible as well and sometimes I'll throw out all kinds of information and realize that this may be too much for you to understand in the moment.

What do I need to adjust or what do I need to take out so that we can talk about the important piece that you can process through or you can understand, Right?

It's the same thing in leading any team member on any piece of information. If you overdo it and you don't give them time to digest, you don't give them time to act on it before you add more information, then they just become overwhelmed.

Solving Every Problem Makes You the Bottleneck (00:06:50)

Number two, solving every problem makes you the bottleneck. People listen to me. I am a problem solver, I am a fixer. I am somebody who loves to fix things.

But praise God, hallelujah. I came to a place of realizing that doesn't, you know, that gives a man a fish, it doesn't teach him how to fish. That gives a man a fish for a day, but it doesn't teach him how to fish for a lifetime, right?

So don't solve every problem. Every problem doesn't matter. Big, small, if it's coming to you and you fix it. Guess what?

Your team is going to love it because you're going to be the problem solver. You're answering everything for them. They're going to love it. Until they don't.

They will stop thinking independently. Everything is probably going to come to a grinding halt because everything has to go through you.

So if you become unavailable, how do we solve stuff? We don't know. Something that does happen in a lot of people's minds is they go, oh, I have to run this through Frank, through Sally.

You better take that to Frank or Sally because you know, they got to give input on this. And what happens is people stop thinking for themselves. You then feel absolutely indispensable, right?

You, you, you, you actually have built this process where your worth is solving people's problems. I'm going to tell you that's not your worth as a leader. As a leader, it is your job to make your team successful, not the other way around.

So if you don't realize you're actually stopping the process for them, you're causing them to have to come to you to get to solution. Which means that at some point you become the bottleneck because everybody has to run everything through you.

Oh, I don't do that. Well, if you actually spend some time, you might find out exactly how much you do do that. Your job is to help them to think for themselves.

Your job is to help them solve the problems on their own. You do that through perspective gathering, asking great questions. What do you think about this? What would you do here? How would you solve that? Right?

Anybody who's been through a StratPlan with us knows that I ask 14 billion questions in a handful of days trying to get people to think for themselves.

Think about this, come up with this, and once in a great while I'll go, I'm not gonna get you to that answer through questions.

So let me just tell you. But it's like maybe three times in a week, right? Problem solving is a fantastic, lovely skill. It is great. But when you do it all, and you do it all the time, then you're training your team to not problem solve instead.

They need to come to you. So what do you do about it? Well, ask, what have you already tried? before you jump in.

Have you, do you have any potential solutions? I don't have any. That's why I came to you. Well, go back and think about it for 10, 15 minutes and come back to me with two or three solutions. Why?

But I don't have anything. Go and spend some time. Go back with this, right?

Encourage ownership. Encourage them, you know, wrestling through this. If they think--- now this is important thing.

If they think that you're going to think they're stupid, you know, if you treat their answers and their solutions as stupid, then they're not going to bring you anything, right?

So for me, I'm constantly going, okay, I can see where you came up with that. I can see where you're going. How's that going to affect this thing over here? Is that going to work in this situation? I will continue to ask questions and treat them with dignity.

What does that do? It causes them to want to always come up with solutions and think for themselves.

Over-Guidance Cripples Creativity and Confidence (00:10:41)

So number three, over guidance cripples creativity and confidence.

So when you map out every step of a job, you know, every step of a project, every step of whatever they're working on, whether it's your team members, your spouse, your kids.

When you map out every step and you give the strategy, you give the process, you give the checklist, you know the format and then you review it all again, what you're doing is---

you, you believe that you're helping, you believe you're giving really good direction-- but what you're really doing is you're dictating, you're dictating to the team.

And your team is probably going to feel like there's no ownership for them. They're probably going to feel like they don't have any buy in, right? Why? Because you've already solved everything.

So they just have to do what you tell them to do. It is incredible.

If you take that situation and give people all the information, see how they respond and, and then contrast it with the time where you bring them in and allow them to be a part of the process, what would you do?

How do you think we should do this? What about this piece over here? What does it look like to implement that? Do you have ideas on how to make this successful?

So it's good to give guidance. It is not good unless you absolutely have to, to map out every aspect of everything. Right now. Sometimes people are going to say, well, Chris, we've already, we've already invented the wheel.

We don't need them to reinvent the wheel. That's not what we're talking about. You've already got a process in place. Teach people the process.

But when you're implementing something, when you have a new project, even if you have all the answers, bring your team members in, treat them with dignity, allow them to be a part of solving it.

So there have been many times that I, I've already known the answer of what I want done or how it should go or whatever.

And then I will ask people and they get there through my questions. Every now and then they're going to come up with something that you're like, oh, I didn't even think about that.

No, that's actually really good. Yes, let's do that piece as well. Because you don't know everything. So it is a fantastic double whammy for you, right?

You're training people to think for themselves. You're training people to solve problems, you're training people to map out processes and projects.

And then you're also probably going to get some information at some point that you had not thought about.

So provide the destination, not the turn by turn directions. Let your team bring their own ideas to the table.

Let them, you know, treat them with dignity and let them be a part of the process. Step back enough to let them own the work. You do those things, you will be blown away at how they will solve and lead projects and things.

Over-Leading Often Comes from a Good Heart—But the Wrong Fear (00:13:46)

Number four, overleading often comes from a good heart but the wrong fear.

So if we are going to be honest, a lot of overleading comes from one of two places. It's either the fear of failure or it's the fear of not being needed. Which one hit you or did both of them hit you? Right.

That's a possibility too. When we are afraid that something's going to fail, we take control. We control it. We don't allow it to get out of our hands.

We might a little bit, but we're going to helicopter parent that thing like crazy and then take it back when it's not working. It's not going the way we want it to, it's not happening the way that we think it should.

That is a terrible process. That's a terrible way to lead people. That fear of failure is going to again, create a team that can't think for themselves.

It's going to create a team that's consistently looking to you for every solution and everything. And guess what? That fear of failure is going to literally transfer to the other people.

People will see that you're afraid of failing because you're pulling everything back. And they're going to receive that. As you don't believe in them, you don't believe they have the talent, you don't believe they can get it done.

All of these things will be communicated from you because literally that's what you are communicating. That's what you think.

If you thought they could get it done, you would leave it in their hands and you would allow them to continue with it. Right? But the fear of failure says, I can't let that person or that team fail.

Therefore I'm going to do x, y, z that is going to train your team to believe that you think that they are not good enough, that you think that they cannot solve things on their own.

You will see a lot of frustration come out of that. You will probably lose champions. If you've got a champion that you're doing that to, they're not going to stay very long because no champion wants to be in that.

A champion wants to be able to run, you know, guide them, direct them, give them guardrails and certain things. But they want to be able to run with something and make things happen.

They, they want purpose bigger than just showing up every day.

So fear of failure will not only cause your team to take zero ownership or have zero buy in, but it will communicate to them that you believe that they're not good enough, that you believe that they can't make this thing happen, that they are going to fail at this.

The other place that a lot of over leading comes from is that fear of not being needed.

Folks, listen, your worth as a leader is, is not in solving everything. Your worth as a leader is not in being the important one. Your worth as a leader is not being the one to make everything happen.

That is not your worth. Your worth as a leader is helping other people become successful. Lead them to being better. Lead them to being better, greater.

Lead them to being more experienced, more trained to think for themselves, to problem solve like crazy, to map projects out.

Lead them to those things. When you do that, guess what will happen to your worth? It will shift from you being the important one who has all the answers to being the one who sets people up for success.

What do you think is going to happen to growth at that point? It's going to explode. It absolutely will. When you are spending time helping people become better, helping people solve problems, and you're not the one who's doing it.

You're not overleading, you're not micromanaging, you're not taking things back because it's not your identity. Then what you will find is you will find much greater identity and purpose and helping other people become successful.

So if you're processing through thinking things like, man, if I don't say something, it's going to get messed up. If I don't take that back, it's going to get messed up or, you know, they're going to struggle if I don't step in.

Then understand that you're in a situation where you're either being driven by fear that it's going to fail or fear that you're not needed.

When your identity leaves you as being the person who solves everything and has all the answers, what you will discover is you are needed way more in helping solve much bigger problems and making people successful.

So don't allow that fear driven leadership to create dependency and literally push, you know, development right out the window.

Great leaders know when to speak up and they absolutely know when to lead others and let them rise.

The Best Leaders Pull Back So Others Can Step Up (00:18:41)

Number five, the best leaders pull back so they can step up.

Now, what you didn't hear me say is something that I said in the last episode is that, you know, many leaders will pull back thinking that's creating freedom and not be involved and all that. That's not what we're talking about right now.

What we are talking about is pulling back from being the answer man, the answer woman, the solutions person. The whatever.

If you will step back from doing that and give people space and you will spend time asking questions and you will wait and you will allow the awkward silence and you will allow people to process through and come up with stuff and not just hammer them.

And you know, you've got to have this answer and allow them to work through things on their own and be there to guide again with more questions, not more answers, more questions that lead them to the better answer.

What you're gonna find is that your team will start thinking strategically. How do I get to that destination that we're supposed to be getting to?

How do I solve that project? How do I lead that thing? They will start solving problems faster. They will take on more initiative.

Folks, I'm talking about a lot of us here. I'm talking definitely talking about me. That's stuff that, you know, for me it was take things on, run with it, figure it out, get it done.

Not everybody thinks that way, but it's definitely how I've led for 30 plus years at this point is helping people to think for themselves, helping people to solve problems.

Because that's what I want, right? That's what I do. So it's vitally important. Many of you I'm speaking to have done the same thing.

You've been the kind of person who made things happen, could, you know, could go after something and drive it to success.

But duplicating that seems to be an issue. And it becomes an issue when you spend way too much time being involved. Step back and allow your team to take the initiative.

Step back and allow your team to work on things strategically. And you know, think of, oh gosh, Jim Collins had a great phrase in Good to Great. The risk profile. I believe it was discover what the risk profile is, right?

How much time do you have before you have to step in? So if you've got time and you don't have to step in on your team, don't allow them time to work on things.

Allow them time to operate on stuff. Allow them time to strategically plan things. If you will do that and you're not going to be the central hub of every decision being made, then you will start building a team that can think for themselves.

You will start building a team that can lead themselves. It's not going to happen overnight, I can promise you that. It's going to take time. But isn't that what you ultimately want?

Don't you want a team that can rock on and you're there for the high level stuff? That's what I want. That's what I have. That's what I've built. Right?

It's stuff that it's taken me a long time to build it, but my team does not in any way, shape or form need me in the day to day.

I could tell you that right now they don't come to me to solve every problem, that they don't come to me to solve most problems. You know, I continue to train up the leadership team and thinking at higher levels, that's my main focus. Right?

That's where you should be as well. Leadership isn't about doing more. It's about helping other people to do better.

Action Steps (00:22:43)

So here's some action steps you can take this week.

Number one, track how often you step in. You know, are you answering before you've even asked any questions? Take a look at how many times you step in. Right?

I'm a teacher. I teach all the time. And one of the things I've had to realize is sometimes I will be teaching and nobody asked me to, and I'll say, hey, do you even want to hear anything on this?

And I will be honest. I've had like two or three times in my life. People have gone, no. And I'm like, great, fantastic. Let me move on, right?

Find out if you're doing too much. You know, are you stepping in where you shouldn't be or are you stepping in to ask questions and, you know, drive, quality perspective.

Second thing is pause before responding. Ask clarifying and coaching questions.

Instead of just responding. Think about what you're about to say. Think about how you're about to shut off.

Thinking for themselves and problem solving for themselves. Think about those things. Pause before you respond.

Number three, cut back your communication by let's try 20% this week. Use fewer, more intentional updates. Don't just give tons of information that might be overwhelming your team.

Number four, ask your team, where. Do you need more from me?

Or you know, do you need more from me? Do you need more space from me? What do you need? Ask your team. They will tell you.

Number five, bring empowerment to your next meeting. Give your team the goal and allow them to time to decide how to get there.

What is the strategy? How are we getting to this goal, this destination? Allow them the time.

Additional Resources (00:24:32)

We've got some great additional resources for you.

Episode 641, the role of coaching and leadership, growing teams through mentorship and episode 642, to little leadership, communication problems, problem solving and guidance.

All of that information. These are. This is the third episode in the series to so go check out parts one and two.

Conclusion (00:24:53)

So when we lead too much, we think we're helping, but we're actually holding our teams back.

So over communication, over solving, over guiding, over leading all leads people to dependency, which can lead them to frustration.

It can lead them to not feeling like they're being treated with dignity. It can lead them to burnouts.

It can lead you, believe it or not, it can even lead you to burnout. So let's stop doing that.

When you learn to lead with balance, to coach, to trust, to step back, then you give your team the greatest gift, and that is ownership. When they have ownership, they will have buy in.

So next week, we'll move into focusing on praise, accountability, delegation, and too little leadership from those aspects.

Folks, keep leading boldly. You got this. You can do this. You know that you can. You just gotta make the decisions to do this intentionally.

Well, that is all the time that we have for today. I hope this has helped you immensely.

As always, take this information. Change your leadership, change your business, change your life, and join us on the next episode.